Oh my goodness. It seems that Greg and I have been so busy talking about ourselves that we’ve neglected to mention a very important member of the Venus and Mars Bars team. A contributing editor, if you will.
Reilly is a 2-year-old red nose pitbull and an irreplaceable member of our family. Reilly’s favorite hobby is chasing squirrels, and he enjoys eating red bell peppers but does not like shrimp. Reilly prefers to sleep with his head on the pillow and will push you out of bed if he does not have enough room. He is a Sagittarius.
Reilly holds several important positions at Venus and Mars Bars. Most importantly, he is the Director of Eating Shit He Is Not Supposed To.
Some of Reilly’s recent projects include:
Post-Its, several clothes hangers, tofu, a pumpkin, a hat, a Banana Republic sweater, 4 collars, 1 leash, a hairbrush, an entire cantaloupe, a lint roller, Scotch tape, a couch cushion, a bath towel, the TV guide, a notebook, all the measuring cups except for the 1/3 cup, and a box of Brillo pads.
Thankfully, with the exception of One Night We Will Not Discuss, Reilly has an iron-clad digestive system. Taking him for a walk is the equivalent of an archaeological dig. What goes in always comes out, often with hot pink Post-It notes flagging the way. This skill set has earned him the title of Poop Master.
Reilly is also a highly-skilled nap-taker and was recently promoted to Sleep Supervisor. While he prefers to do most of his napping from 9-5, he often works overtime to get the job done. Reilly has an incredible work ethic.
Occasionally, Reilly also does some freelance work as a Gas Manager. This role generally involves slinking up behind his co-workers and releasing deadly fumes.
On several occasions, Reilly has been known to clear an entire room. After several run-ins with upper management, it seems necessary that we fill this position permanently with a less-potent candidate.
Reilly may pop up on the blog from time to time, so it seemed appropriate to give him a formal introduction. He is currently accepting applications for Full Time Belly Scratchers, so if you know of anyone interested, please email us at: